The Window Builder - Coming Oct 9th!

This is the moment every aspiring author, including me, dreams of. Their first published novel. I couldn't be happier than to see it happen to Kelly. She has been a member of my writing group for two years now, and she has serious talent. 

A number of months ago, Marilyn Bunderson (another published member of our writing group) informed us of a short story writing contest by Cedar Fort. Kelly entered and while her story wasn't chosen to be included in an anthology of short Christmas stories, something even better happened. Cedar Fort decided to publish it as a stand-alone short story. Her book is now available on Amazon.com for pre-order. I've ordered mine--have you?

The Window Builder has all the trappings of a Hallmark holiday movie special. You won't be disappointed. Congratulations Kelly! And I have to say . . . I LOVE the cover. 

30 Months

That's how long its taken me to do a major re-write of my novel, THE LACKAWANNA PROPHECIES--CHOSEN. Scary when you consider it only took me three months to write the first draft. Call it Life Interrupted. The point is that I never gave up. I never stopped writing (at least not of my own doing). And now two drafts later my novel has polished up with a nice sheen.

I'm working on a fourth draft--mostly to touch up the ending--but I am there. Meaning I am finally ready for the query process. It's scary to read some of my earlier posts, when I soooo naively thought I was ready. But now I am. And the learning curve has been more than worth it (oh, the pain!). I am a better writer. Period. I owe much to my writing group (Kelly, Marilyn, Cheryl, and Brooke) as well as my brother Zach. Helps to have an English professor in the family. Some prefer dentists or doctors, but I'll stick with my literary phenom.

So, wish me luck. The query process has officially begun.

You Are Going To Die

* * * HERE IS A SMALL FACT * * *

You are going to die.

This is one of the opening quotes in The Book Thief (by Markus Zusak). The personification of death makes the book worth reading on its own. I am especially intrigued with this book because the middle grade novel I am finishing up, Lackawanna Prophecies--CHOSEN, is centered around death.

I read an article about the life of Walter Breuning, interviewed before he died at 114 years old. This is my favorite quote from him: "We're going to die. Some people are scared of dying. Never be afraid to die. Because you're born to die."

Perhaps easier said than done, but at 114 years of age or those suffering great mortal pain, death comes as a relief. To a small degree, I experienced the idea of this during the worst part of my recovery from a severe concussion. I was trapped in my own mind because any form of communication made me sick. I couldn't even watch TV or listen to music. It was just me in the dark. Imagining that condition for any significant period of time, and I have to believe that death would be a welcomed relief. My hope is that kids will perhaps be able to look at death with a little more objectivity after reading my novel. That death isn't as scary or horrid as it seems, but instead a natural thing that happens to everyone in its time.

The twist or hook for my novel is this:

In a world where no one can escape death, some are chosen to experience it again and again.

* * * DON'T BE AFRAID * * *

Dusting Off The Cobwebs

Life interrupted. That's how I've felt over the past six months. Last November I suffered a serious concussion playing basketball--and the referee didn't even call a foul. Where's the justice in that? The body blow to my head was like someone scraping the bottom of a pond (my brain), kicking up a foggy swath of dirt, debris and everything else that made it near impossible for me to function on a cognitive level.

Man down.

Yes, that's how it was. Locked in the tower of my home for 2 weeks before I could even handle something as basic as a quiet, brief conversation. Phone, TV, my children . . . it was all more than I could handle. Everything made me sick. It was almost three months before I even dared venture back to the office for work. My brain got saturated so fast, that I couldn't handle anything that required serious thought for more than a few minutes at a time.

Don't make me cry.

Okay, I finally get it. Women don't have to have a reason to cry. Cry all you want. I did. The first four months of my recovery were filled with random moments of pure emotion that spilled out my eyes--sometimes for no reason at all. I was starting to wonder if someone had slipped me a heavy dose of estrogen during one of my hospital visits. Thankfully, order seems to have been restored in that department.

Will I ever be normal again?

Who knows. What's normal? I'm working 40 hours a week now and have been for two months, but I'm only in the office 3-4 days a week. I'm trying to bump that up to 4-5 days a week. I still get dizzy every day and nausea seems to be my new best friend. I've been wearing sea band bracelets and those seem to be helping. I've also been wearing a Halter monitor for two weeks to see if there is anything wrong with my heart. So far everything looks a-okay. All good news. My biggest issue is that my energy/strength levels have only recovered to about 70-80%, sometimes a little less depending on the day. And the brain drains are still happening on occassion. Doesn't that sound like fun? Yes, it feels like my brain drains out the back of my head. And when that happens it wipes me out pretty fast. I was in the ER three times two weeks ago due to the infamous brain drain, trying to figure out what was wrong. All tests revealed nothing. Hey, I guess I'm normal.

It's all in my head.

Yes, that is what I'm coming to believe. The muddy waters are still setlling and perhaps on occasion I'm still bumping into a log or rock as I swim through the foggy haze. The good news is that most of my life activities have returned to a new normal. I'm working. I'm writing. I'm throwing ball with my boys. Heck, I even started a major remodeling job on my home. I know,  probably not the smartest thing, but there's no going back on that one--not after sawing through two walls and ripping out two other doorframes.

Dusting off the cobwebs

So alas, here we are again, not that anyone is reading because I've been gone for months. Hey, I know, you can only wait around so long. But I'm back. And I've resumed the re-write of my novel, "The Lackawanna Prophecies: CHOSEN." I'm working on chapter 18 with about ten more chapters to go. I was supposed to be done in January. Perhaps I will be--next January. I'm just grateful to be writing.

I hope you are too!

The "Right" Word

Mark Twain said, "The difference between the right word and almost the right word is the difference between lightening and a lightning bug."

When you're stuck, how do you find that right word? I often find myself checking MS Word's synonym checker, but those only go so far. What other resources does your inner "word freak" tap into? I'd love to know!

One right word that struck home for me the other day was in "The Help," by Kathryn Stockett. How often do we read about being short of breath in scary or threatening situations?  She put a unique twist on it for me that struck home in a powerful way--a word that resonated because I had experienced it, but never quite thought of it that way.

" . . . my breath slipped out of me . . ." Simple, effective and memorable, it was the right word in the right context.

 Lightning.

Inspiration

As much as I love writing, sometimes I just need to be inspired. Spending last week at Lake Powell with my wife and friends did that for me.

One of the highlights of our trip was visiting Rainbow Bridge, the largest natural bridge in the world. There's something magical about the awe and grandeur of nature. Getting away, and especially to a place like this, rejuvenates me in a way that nothing else can. I felt twenty again (don't I look it?).

The creative juices are flowing again.What gets you going when you're fingers are plodding instead of flying across the keyboard?

Now Hiring - Managing Editor and Technology/Marketing Manager

The "Managing Editor" and "Technology and Marketing Manager" positions are now officially posted and will be open until September 18th. If you know of any good candidates for the position, please encourage them to apply. Both of these positions will be a part of our new Global Communications Team.

Go to: http://lds.org/emp/new/home.html and type in a key word from either of the two job titles. As these two positions are for the LDS Church, you must be a member in good standing to apply. Pass the word on.

My New Job!

Yikes! It's been almost two months since I last posted. I think I've been having too much fun this summer. Sorry. Now on to the good stuff. For the first time in my 12 year (post college) career, I am starting a new job outside of IT (information technology).

I am now the Global Communications Manager at the LDS Church for all workforce communications. The part about this job that sends tingles up and down my spine is that my professional job is aligning with my passion for writing. I get to be paid while I attend writing conferences--how cool is that? In a few days I will be posting a job requisition to hire an Editorial Manager and a Technology/Marketing Manager, who will fill out the rest of my team. Good times.

On a side note, I am half way through my re-write of The Lackawanna Prophecies--CHOSEN. My critique group has been invaluable in the process. If you don't have one, get one.

LIE versus LAY

Okay, I'll admit. I just havn't been into the blogging thing lately. I've been too engrossed in working on my manuscript. But it's good to stick my head out from under the covers every once in a while. Here's a helpful grammar tip. Hope your enjoying the summer!

LIE versus LAY

1. PAST TENSE: Sometimes memorization is just best

• She lay down on her sofa to read.
• She laid the book on the table, I swear.
• She was lying on the carpet when it happened.

 2. PRESENT TENSE: Remember that the gerund form (WAS –ING) uses present tense.

•  She was laying down on her sofa to take a nap when the house exploded.
•  She was lying on the carpet when it happened.

 TIP: Use an irregular verb like EAT/ATE to figure out which tense you need.

• She was ating on the floor (no, so it couldn't be laying)
• She was eating on the floor (yes, so she was lying on the floor)

Thirteen Reasons Why

My eight year old nephew and namesake passed away, and I spent this past weekend in Boston for the funeral. It's only the fourth funeral that I've attended, and the first one that I've been asked to speak at.

While Benjamin died peacefully in his sleep, his body tired from the wearing handicaps he had been born with, it was still a stark reminder of the fragility of life.

I did not purposefully time the reading of Jay's first novel, Thirteen Reasons Why, with the events of this past weekend, but I'm glad it worked out that way. Jay's haunting story ends with hope and a desire to be the type of person who would be celebrated rather than grieved at their passing. Life is a gift, and Benjamin's short life was a blessing to many--more than 500 people who showed up to say, "Thank you." 

This is a book I will ask my kids to read before they start high school, to realize how everything we do impacts someone, even if only ourselves. But most likely--always--there are others that we don't know about. Aren't we lucky that we get to choose how?

Story Structure

I attended a fantastic presentation by Dan Wells, at a writers conference back in February on story structure.

If you 're great at characterization, but struggle at weaving a compelling storyline together, this should be helpful. He refers to it as The Seven Point System. Before you start putting this structure together, you at least need to know who the main characters are, what the setting is, and what the major conflict is. Once you have those, start plugging in the rest as follows:

1. Hook

2. Plot Turn 1

3. Pinch 1

4. Midpoint

5. Pinch 2

6. Plot Turn 2

7. Resolution

Of course there can be several more pinches added, or even plot turns, but this is the basic structure--and it works. Sometimes it helps to start backwards.

The Resolution. Everything in your story should be leading up to this moment. What is your protagonist trying to overcome? Is it an external thing, force, etc, an internal thing, perhaps a combination of both?

The Hook. What is the hook that will grab your readers on page 1 or at the very least in chapter one and keep them turning the pages? Sometimes you have to use the ice-monster approach (think Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back where the movie begins with Luke being attacked by an ice-monster). Starting your novel with a lot of boring background / back story information is a big no, no - - especially if you're trying to get published for the first time. Dive right into the story and sink a hook into their reader that they can't escape from.

The midpoint is that magical place in your story where your protagonist finally begins to move from a reactionary state to one of action and determination (think Lord of the Rings and the Council of Elrond - when they finally decide what to do with the ring). It doesn't mean conflict and turmoil is over, it just means they're finally starting that journey towards resolution.

Plot Turn 1, is what moves you from the beginning to the midpoint. Major conflict is introduced, the protagonist’s world changes, etc. (think about Luke coming back and finding his Uncle dead or Harry Potter learning that a world of magic exists and he's a part of it)

Plot Turn 2, (can you guess?) moves the story from midpoint to resolution--where your protagonist receives that final thing needed to make it happen (think Neo, "The Power is in you!" or Dorothy in Wizard of Oz when she realizes all she has to do is click her heels or Luke: "Use the force Luke!")

Pinch 1, is where conflict is introduced--and the pressure is applied to your protagonist. Could be a bad guy attacks, a sickness, a death, etc--something that forces your character to action (think Harry Potter - when they discover a troll in the bathroom and no adults are around to help).

Pinch 2, apply more pressure until the situation feels hopeless--like there is no way to escape, at least until you get to plot turn 2-- starting to make sense? (think about when Gandalf appears to have been killed by the fiery demon from hell)

This structure can be used for the Hero's journey, romance, tragedy, etc. - - don't feel constrained by genre. As you work through this, make sure your protagonist goes through the try/fail cycles (at least twice). This can be done through multiple pinches where it doesn't always work out in the protagonist's favor. Victory should always be earned - - keep building the overall tension to the resolution with a few small victories along the way. Spread out the action to keep good pacing (your beta readers can help you with that).

Last of all, remember, this is a structure and is not a replacement for good writing. It helps if you take this and break down an existing book/movie as an example. Give it a try with Avatar and see what you come up with. The format works on just about any well written novel/script.

Imagine My Fear

As a writer, I often find myself drawing upon life’s experiences—even in a fictional world. Today, I share with you one such example that bristles the hairs on my arms, when contemplating what could have been.
----------------------------------

My wife had major reconstructive surgery on her abdominal wall this past week. When we passed the three day mark, she expressed a desire to take a shower before having to go back to see the doctor.

Mistake #1: not taking the recliner into the master bath.
When we unzipped/took off her compression garment, from her knees up to her chest, the pressure change caused her to be light of head. I quickly helped her sit down on the edge of the bath tub. That was when she passed out in my arms and started convulsing. It was not violent, just a lot of involuntary body twitching that scared the hell out of me.

Mistake #2: locking the bathroom door so the kids could not come in.
I didn't dare try and move my wife for fear of hurting her. She has drainage tubes coming out of her lower abdomen and sutured stitches spanning hip to hip. I yelled to her mother to come help--only she couldn't get in. Imagine my fear. I couldn't lay her down. I couldn't stand her up. Her face is ashen white and she won't respond. My mother-in-law is trying to bust the doors open, and I'm trying to revive the love of my life. My lips lock over hers, but her mouth won’t open. I call her name over and over again, but she doesn’t answer, her limp arms hanging at my side. I wonder for a brief moment if this is it—if this is how it ends—and everything inside me screams no! I slap her face with my free hand, desperate to wake her up. The bathroom door explodes open as her mother hurls herself through the double doors with the aid of my younger son. She grabs my wife’s shoulders, sinking her cold fingernails into her skin. Joy speaks. After almost two minutes of eternal silence my wife speaks, even if dazed and confused. I squeeze her tight and never want to let go.

CHOSEN - First Page

Thank you to everyone who has read and critiqued my First 100 Words post. I'm going to spend the next month polishing up THE LACKAWANNA PROPHECIES - CHOSEN (no surprise) and then begin the querying process. As a token of my thanks, here's my latest draft of the first page of my manuscript.
--------------
  
     Shivering and cold, I woke up in the dark, lying in a shallow pool of water, on an uncomfortable bed of rock. “Mom—” My voice echoed. Frightened and oblivious to where I was or how I got there, I thought perhaps I was having another bad dream.
     Sitting up, the cool water dripped down my naked back and arms. Why was my head pounding?
     I couldn’t remember and nothing about this felt like a dream.
     Not able to see a thing, I lifted my hands out of the water and reached out into the damp air—there was nothing there. The musty odor and rocky surface made me think I was in an abandoned mine shaft. There were dozens of them in Carbondale, Pennsylvania, and I loved to explore them . . . that’s it—
     “Jude, help!” My best friend didn’t respond. “Jude . . .”
     My mind raced back, determined to remember what had happened, but the harder I tried, the more lost I felt. I had never explored a coal mine barefoot, never mind half-naked, and certainly not alone. The only thing I was sure of was that it was my thirteenth birthday, and that this wasn’t where I was supposed to be.
     Staying close to the ground as I got up, hunched-over with my arms outstretched, I sucked in a mouthful of heavy air and coughed. My body revolted against the wetness, and each time I coughed, it felt like a jack-hammer ripping through my head, determined to crush its way down to my aching lungs.
     What’s wrong with me? My right eye felt like it was glued shut, so I reached up and winced in pain as I touched the puffy flesh. What happened? Where am I? My body started to shake. “Help me!”

The First 100 Words

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to heaven, we were all going direct the other way - in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.  ~ Charles Dickens

How important is it to have a good start to your book? How patient will your readers be before the hook comes?  I'm learning that as an aspiring author without a loyal fan base to fall back on, it's paramount. Here are the first 100 words to both of my books. When you read them, what does this do for you?  Would you want to continue? How hooked do you feel?

FINDING HOME

     Emily tipped the non-descript metallic urn upside down at the edge of the glistening reservoir and watched with guarded interest as a gentle breeze carried the ashes away. A single tear rolled down her pale cheek. It was the last time she would cry over her mother.

                                                                      * * * *

     “So, are you excited for high school?” asked Mary, Emily’s new case worker. “Freshman year is always an exciting one.”
     Ignoring Mary’s lame attempts at small talk, Emily stared out the car window with a bitter scowl on her face. It was dark, cold, and rainy—summer was over, and as far as Emily was concerned, so too was her life.


THE LACKAWANNA PROPHECIES - CHOSEN

     I knew I was in trouble.
     Shivering and cold, I woke up in the dark, lying in a shallow pool of water, on an uncomfortable bed of rock. “Mom—” My voice echoed. Frightened and oblivious to where I was or how I got there, I thought perhaps I was having another bad dream.
     Sitting up, the cool water dripped down my naked back and arms. Why was I in my swim trunks? And why was my head pounding?
     I couldn’t remember.
     Nothing about this felt like a dream. Not able to see a thing, I lifted my soggy hands out of the water and reached out into the damp air—there was nothing there.

Party in the USA

Something different today. This guy makes me laugh.  FYI, critique group was great last night. I think I might be getting ready to share that first chapter :)